A goal should scare you a little and excite you a lot…

 

gratitude

 

Guys, it’s almost 2018.

Like, in 18 days, a new year will be upon us.

I keep coming across “On the Day” memories on Facebook and to think of where I was this day last year, yesterday last year, or even the first of this year, so much has happened that I could have never even imagined.

While none of us are ever certain what the future holds, it’s exciting to experience it firsthand as it unfolds right before our very eyes.

Of course, I can’t recall every exact moment as it happened but the big ones, of course I do. Around this time last year I was contemplating and wondering if a change might happen where I would end up back in Michigan. Little did I know at the time, a month later, I would be.

Living and working in Indiana at The Chronicle-Tribune was a great experience. I remember driving there, by myself, two and a half hours to my interview, nervous, not knowing what to expect, but hoping with all my might I would get the job. After all, it had been almost two years since I had graduated from Central Michigan University and at that point, my optimism about me landing a job as a reporter was starting to dwindle.

But, into the office I went and talked with Dave and Tyler, and after a few minutes feeling a sense of ease. I wasn’t as nervous and suddenly thought about all the possibilities there would be for me there if they offered me the job. Of course, like most jobs, they had other candidates vying for the position, too, and so a part of me couldn’t help but wonder, what if that person was more qualified than me?

So I wait for the next few weeks to see if I hear anything than them. I was constantly checking my phone and e-mail, only to see “no new messages.” Finally, it got to the point where I felt confident enough to follow up with them myself and see if the position had been filled.

I was extremely nervous calling and half of me was expecting yet another “Sorry, we ended up going with another candidate” or some variation of that message, only to be pleasantly surprised that I had been offered the job.

I wanted to scream! I was silently jumping up and down on my end of the line, trying to contain my excitement while still remaining composed on the phone.

I thought, could this be real life?

Of course while I was excited I knew I had a big decision to make. Would I accept, or respectfully decline?

I wanted to say yes immediately, but given the job was out of state and that I knew very little, if anything, about Marion, that I would need to do thorough research about where to live, cost of living, etc.

I didn’t ponder this while on the phone but I did let them know I would need a day or two to think before giving them my final answer.

Looking back, I can’t remember now if I actually even waited a full day or two, but I do remember excitedly calling up my all of my family and closest friends that day, gleaming with pure excitement.

Fast forward to my first day, and I was nervous. I was super excited, but I was nervous because it was a new environment for me, both the place of work and the city I was in. I remember being very reserved and quiet around my coworkers, not sure how to break the ice with them and become more than just coworkers, but friends, too, and I spent a good long while simply keeping to myself to make sure I stayed in the good graces of the big bosses and doing as I was told.

Fast forward even more, and soon Amy left go to back to teaching at Indiana Wesleyan University, which meant we had a vacancy for a new reporter. I was nervous who might join us, but later I would find out I had no reason to be nervous.

Andrea ended up joining us and soon her, Navar and I became best buddies, laughing, tweeting, Snapchatting and group texting 24/7. We would even go out to lunch together on a regular basis, too. It was a blast.

But, while as much fun as I was having with them, and enjoyed getting to know the Marion community and local officials, there was something gnawing at me on the inside that told me I wanted to come back to Michigan.

Michigan is my home. It’s where I grew up, what I’ve known my whole life. It’s where my family is at and family is the most important thing to me. And while my job was just as important, I knew I wasn’t completely 100 percent satisfied, even if I kept telling myself I was.

So, flash forward some more to end of December 2016/beginning of January 2017 and I am scheduling am interview at The Argus-Press.

Talk about being nervous. I was even more nervous about this interview because I knew at that point I had to be discreet about it seeing as I was still working for the C-T.

In the end, everything worked out just fine, but the whole experience of ending one job and beginning another brought a mix of emotions.

Ultimately, I would learn, it would be one of the best decisions I made.

In just over one month, on Jan. 16, 2018, will be the one year anniversary of when I began working for The Argus-Press.

Looking back on the year, both professionally and personally, it doesn’t feel as though it’s been a whole year. I think of certain memories and think, no way could that have happened in January, or no way could that have happened in May, etc.

I traveled to Nashville, my youngest nephew turned one, I was able to celebrate holidays (albeit however Hallmark-ish they were, lol) with a special someone, went camping in an actual tent for my first time (LOL), turned 28, gained a new cousin, gained new friends, parted myself from things and people who no longer served my life in a positive way and so much more.

So much has happened, none of which I could have pictured at the end of 2016. So as I sit here and wonder about what will happen in 2018, I won’t be nervous. I will look forward to the new year with excitement.

I don’t know what will happen, nor does any silly Facebook quiz (LOL), but here’s what I hope will happen:

I hope for a new year filled with happiness. Although as I know life goes, I’m sure it will be bound with some tears here and there, but only temporarily.

I hope to open myself up to love again. I can’t tell you how much I love the concept and idea of love and how excited I am, whenever it may be — whether it’s in 2018 or the year after or the year after that—to fall in love.

I hope to fall in love with my job even more than I already have.

I hope to make new friends here, not just work interview sources, but actual people I can call my friends.

I hope to really get to know more about the city here and the surrounding areas so I am apt to stay in town more on weekends I don’t work.

I hope to travel more, which I am already planning to at the end of February to visit my best friend and her boyfriend in their new house they now live in together.

I hope to make new friendships in general, just not here where I’m living.

I hope to be able to better let go of circumstances and people who no longer serve me or put forth the same effort to have me in their life.

Most of all, aside from my own happiness, I hope that my family and friends experience happiness throughout their new year as well. every day, because they deserve it.

Like I said, no one ever really knows what the new year will bring but I have a feeling mine will be just a great, because while I won’t expect it, it’ll be whatever was meant to happen to me… because everything happens for a reason.

So don’t be scared or anxious… Be excited about the future and remember to always cherish past memories because it’s all we have at the end of the day when the day is done and over with. 🙂

So tell me, what do you hope the new year brings you?

Tell me in the comments.

Until next time…

XO,

Anamaria

Change is inevitable, progress is optional…

So, it’s been a minute since I’ve last blogged.

Okay, so it’s been two months but, I’ve busy with work, a bridal shower, a bachelorette party, my 26th birthday, patiently (okay, not so patiently waiting) for the arrival of my nephew, etc. etc.

Alright, so maybe I haven’t been that busy to where I couldn’t blog but let me tell you, sleep is my number two priority after work. LOL. When I am not working or busy with other commitments you can guarantee I am sleeping or watching ridiculous Lifetime Movie Network movies.

Anyway… Moving along.

So today actually marks the two month anniversary of when I moved into my apartment and then on Saturday it will have been two months since I started my first day at C-T. (That’s The Chronicle-Tribune for those of you who don’t know the abbreviation, lol, because I don’t feel like repeatedly typing it out)

Work has been a learning process–fun, cool, exciting. I still consider myself a rookie because coming in I felt a bit rusty. I had just finished up my internship at HOMTV and yes, I obviously studied journalism and got my degree in it and had my intern at WLNS, etc., but, being back in a print-focused atmosphere was something I was struggling to get a hold of again. Thankfully my co-workers and boss are awesome and have been helping me out along the way. I mean yeah I still have more to learn, and always will, I believe with any job it’s like that, and thankfully I’ve had great mentors along the way.

Of course, while I’m learning a lot and still getting to know the town of Marion, I wouldn’t be being completely honest if I said I didn’t have some challenges along the way. Like for example, after the Fourth of July holiday weekend when I was leaving my cottage to come back I got upset, and quite honestly, it was hard to say my “see you later’s” to my family. My mom saw it firsthand, and as any good mom, she told me everything would be okay. And deep down I knew it would be, but, at that exact moment I didn’t want to leave after having spent an incredible weekend with my whole immediate family, plus my uncle Steve.

Fast forward to this past weekend, and same thing happened. I know, it sounds pathetic, especially being 26-years-old–an adult–living on her own but, it did happen again and, I have no doubt it will happen again until I become more familiar with Marion and meeting friends and having people to hang out with instead of just constantly being by myself in my apartment when I get home from work. Anyway, this time it happened not while I was leaving from home in Michigan to my home here, but rather, leaving Nashville and coming back home to Indiana but wanting to make it all the way back to Michigan for just the night so I could finally meet my nephew Stone.

So Stone was born on Wednesday, July 27, 2016. My sister-in-law, Jamie, went to the hospital early Tuesday morning (like the middle of the night), and my mom called me at 6:30 a.m. to tell me she had so. Of course that was the morning I was scheduled to drive down to Nashville to stay with my old college roommate and friend, Kayla, and see my cousin’s new house and then spend the rest of the weekend celebrating the bride-to-be, Alison, and I was put in a tough spot. Part of me was dying to go home instead so I could be there when he was actually born but, the other part of me wanted to stick to my plan and go on to Nashville because I thought it would be rude if I didn’t. Plus, what ultimately made me choose Nashville over the birth of Stone was that I knew I wouldn’t get to celebrate Alison and her bachelorette party again, but, that Stone would and will always be there when I visit home next. It was still a tough decision for me and as soon as he was actually born and my mom sent me pictures I felt like I was immediately starting to regret making the trip down south. He was more beautiful and perfect than I could have ever imagined. Words couldn’t describe the feelings I had when I saw him (in picture form) for the first time. But, let’s just say I was at out shopping at the mall at the time and definitely started tearing up, in the baby clothes department, looking all kinds of pathetic. LOL.

Fast forward to Tuesday, two days ago, and when I found out I would get to leave early from work I knew I had to make the 2.5 hour drive home to see my nephew. Sure, I will be going home again tomorrow but, I seriously just couldn’t take it any longer. I drove home as fast as I could and when I got to my brother and sister-in-law’s house, I RAN to the front door. (And for those who know me, you know I don’t run for anything–I HATE running, lmao.) I open the door and see Jamie feeding Stone, and I am even more shocked and taken away at how precious, beautiful and perfect he really is. I called Jamie as I was leaving town to tell her I was coming home and wanted to see him and also warned her I would probably cry when I saw him. Thankfully I was able to hold my tears back but I kid you not, every time I look at a picture of him, and even yesterday when I was out shopping for groceries at Meijer but then “somehow” ended up in the baby boy clothes section, I started tearing up. LOL.

I’m sure some of you are probably wondering why I am so emotional over Stone and maybe even some of my family members are thinking back to when their babies were born and how I didn’t act like this. It’s not that I love any of my other nieces and nephews any less or anything like that–I will tell you now that being an aunt is my greatest “gig” yet and I’ve been lucky enough to be one since I was 2.5 years old. But with Stone, it is different. And I will tell you why…

My older brother Adam, is someone, who despite us literally fighting sometimes or him just being a natural big brother and picking on me from time to time in general, is someone I appreciate and look up to. I look up to all of my siblings, yes, and I love them all the same. But, for those of you who know Adam–you know he is, how do I put it? A bit “rough around the edges”, if you will. He’s not perfect by any means but, who is? No one. When he was growing up he wasn’t a horrible teenager but, he wasn’t an angel either. (Love you, Adam) And so of course when he and Jamie told the family at Christmas last year that they were expecting I lost it. Mind you, I had a few glasses of wine in me, lol, but, even to present day, I get emotional thinking about him as a dad. I guess to be honest there were some days, some moments where I thought, “Adam as a dad? Yeah right, not any time soon–more like not for a long time.” And, I think part of me thought this because I had always known him to be the one who likes to have fun, doing whatever it may be. But, after the news broke and time went on, I knew he and Jamie were going to be forced to “grow up” (not saying that they were careless/reckless or anything like that) or rather, “upgrade” to parent status. It was weird to think about, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t have doubts but, at the end of the day, I knew they would make great parents. Like any parents, I imagine (I can’t speak 100% because I myself am not a parent yet), they will make mistakes and deal with Stone acting out as he grows up and gets older but, that’s normal for any family with kids. Seeing Adam transition from the “having fun” guy to dad, is something that’s very sentimental to me. (If that’s the right word to use??) Not that I am not proud of Jamie, or my other siblings with kids, but, this is my big brother, Adam, we’re talking about. It’s just something that’s hard to explain without it coming out wrong so if you’re reading this and taking it the wrong way, I am sorry. It just is something different with Adam being a dad. Even just typing this is making me emotional.

At the end of the day, I love all of my nieces and nephews the same. I hate that they grow up so fast, though, which, is also part of the reason I think I am so obsessed and in love with Stone. That, and we haven’t had a baby boy since… Calvin, I believe, and he’ll be 10 (?) this year. REALLY?! It’s just crazy how fast time goes by and how quickly each one of them grows up. Even Annabelle, who will be 3-years-old in December (OMG, that just hit me… THREE?!), has grown up so fast right before my very eyes. And that’s not to say my nieces and nephews aren’t as fun when they grow up, but, their priorities shift as they get older just like mine did. My niece Madi has two daughters, is engaged… My nephew Drew is in college, has a job… My nephew Zach is a SENIOR in high school and will graduate next year… My niece, Gabi, will be fourteen, WHAT?!… My nephew Max will be THIRTEEN (I think, right? See, I myself am getting too old to remember everyone’s age, LOL) in December AND he now has his own cell phone. I texted him a couple times so far and one time when I texted him asking him if he was watching Big Brother he said “no” and then didn’t really say much to me after that so he must have been too tired to text me too 😦 LOL… My niece Amelia and nephew Calvin will both be 10 in November… My nieces Raelynn and Gigi will both start Kindergarten in the fall… And like I said earlier, Annabelle will be THREE in December. And then my niece, Ashlyn, and her girlfriend are both working and have a place of their own and then my nephew, Corey, and his fiancee have their own place too with their two kids and pets. I mean, they’re all grown up! This is partly why I freaked when I wasn’t there when Stone was born because I there for just about every other birth of my nieces and nephews and to not be able to be there for Stone tore me apart. Even now, living away, it’s hard because I know I don’t get to see him all the time like I did growing up with my other nieces and nephews.

I have to remind myself though that I don’t live that far and can always come home on a weekend if I don’t work, but, living away in general is still taking getting used to. My mom and dad assure me it will be fine, and I know deep down they’re right. It’s just going to take time.

Hopefully soon I will meet people to hang out with and stuff, but, even if not, it’s a part of the growing up process–just like my mom told me. I am an adult now and she said herself, I can do it. I’m thankful to have the best parents in the world who refuse to let me give up when times get tough. They believe in me enough to know that I can work past whatever it is that is thrown my way. So mom, dad–thank you both. Thank you to all of my family for giving me that push I needed to make the move to work my dream job and do what I love most.

I know there will always be challenges here and there in the future, in whatever aspect/stage of life, but, they’re always there behind me.

Until next time…

XO,

Ana

Dreams don’t work unless you do…

Well, I did it.

I not only accepted a job offer that would allow me to do what I love most and have always wanted to do–write and be a reporter–but, I also moved–OUT of state. What? Can you even believe it?

I still can’t.

I’m sitting here on a Friday night, having successfully completed my first week as a reporter for The Chronicle-Tribune. I tell ya, every time I walk towards my building and see the name on the building (AND see my byline in print) I get all tingly inside.

I know, it sounds a tad lame, but, after almost nearly two years of applying to journalism job after journalism job, I was beginning to think I might never get to work in my field. I thought, maybe I would be like most other college graduates where they earned a degree in something specific, but, then did something completely non-related–and not by choice.

After I had my in person interview I gave it a lot of thought and wondered if I could and actually would move away from home. Sure, I lived away for college, but, it was in the SAME state and only ONE hour away. My new home now is just under three, which is actually not quite as far is my cottage is up north, which is nice. But, I remember doing the Disney College Program three years ago and feeling happy on one hand I was working at the happiest place on Earth, but, then having the other part of me feeling like a part of me was missing because I was so far away from my family. And I mean yeah, I knew it wouldn’t be for forever–the program was only a semester long but, to me, it felt like it was going to be forever until I saw them again.

Flash forward three years later, to now, and here I am at just two weeks away from turning 26-years-old, living on my own, and working my dream career as a reporter. I smiled as I typed that because it just still seems surreal. While I am not 100% unpacked and therefore don’t feel 100% absolute settled in, I’ve been doing my best to adjust my life accordingly at my new apartment, my job and the town of Marion in general. And yes, I miss my family and friends like crazy but, honestly, I keep so busy that sometimes I just simply don’t have time to miss them. (Of course I don’t mean that as a bad thing. I always miss them in the back of my mind.)

Let me give you my opinion on the town of Marion…

It’s definitely different than back home. But, like any town across the U.S., it has both good parts and bad parts to it. The good/nice part about it is that it is trying to rebuild itself; it has the huge General Motors factory; and, it has some of the nicest people I’ve had the pleasure of meeting. Sure, I’ve also had some “different” encounters, but, it’s what makes this new chapter of my life so interesting. And then there’s the bad–there’s some areas that are really run down, there’s a big heroin and pseudophedrine problem here. But, like I said, this town has good and bad just like any other.

Now, as for my job, even though it’s only been one full week of working at it, I really do enjoy it so far. My boss is awesome, as is my other boss, and my co-workers have been nothing but extremely helpful. It’s definitely a fast-paced job–probably more so than I was actually expecting, but, my boss cares about all of us employees and he even checked in with me today to make sure I was doing alright. Speaking of… I had a story due today for an upcoming Rubber Duck Race and, by accident, I deleted the interview from my phone through voice memos, and, sadly, in this day and age of iPhones, it couldn’t be retrieved. Now of course I did what any good reporter would do and I also wrote information down in my reporter’s notebook, as well as immediately told my boss what happened. He was understanding, and told me to write the article to the best of my ability. I told him I would get right on it, although, a small part of me on the inside was panicking, not thinking I would be able to pull it off. But, I did. And while it was aggravating for me to make a mistake like that so soon in the game, I was proud of myself for overcoming it.

Other than that flub, today and this week in general has been interesting. I say interesting because I can’t really think of a better way to describe it. I don’t mean it to be a bad thing but, the stories I’ve gotten to write have been unique. My first story assignments were about GM celebrating its 60th anniversary today at its Marion plant and the other was about the first performance for the Concert in the Park series. That was really cool because of all the people it brought to it, and the cute elderly couple I had the pleasure of interviewing and talking to. Another story I did was the goat show yesterday evening. Now that one I will tell you, I was super nervous about because I didn’t know anything about goats, let alone a goat show. But, I somehow pulled it off and I think it was a good piece. Which reminds me… A man who participated in the show wanted me to e-mail him a copy. I’ll do that later.

And then of course there was my story today. At the local county jail 34 men and women were baptized. Going into it I had my own personal thoughts about it, but, as a reporter it’s my job to be objective. So I went and interviewed a young woman who had tears in her eyes as she told me about how growing up she had a hard life and wanted to really turn her life around and how she thought getting baptized was a step in the right direction. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what it was like to be in her shoes or any of the other inmates in there. But, deep down, I did hope that their baptisms really do lead them in the right direction. As did the sheriff there–you could tell by the way he interacted with the men and women that he really does care for them, and, he even told me he has high hopes of these individuals turning their lives around.

So as you can see, this week has been a whirlwind. I’m exhausted, and like I said, I’m still not fully unpacked, and, as I was working on unpacking some more before writing this post, I realized I have TOO. MUCH. DAMN. STUFF. Well, okay, so I blamed the small closet and cabinet space and lack of dresser but then I snapped myself back to reality and realized it’s just because I have too much stuff. If you look under my bathroom sink and see all of my Bath and Body Works body washes and hand soaps you would think I was a hoarder, which, maybe I am just a tad. 😉

But anyway… Fun/random fact… My dad was kind enough to buy me a hammer and nails so I could actually be an adult and hang the rest of the stuff he and my grandpa didn’t get to last weekend. LOL. So far I’ve hung TWO things. Woo! Making progress. HAHA!

Other fun facts…

  • I asked my friend Dennis who is originally from Indiana if they return bottles here and he said no, and said if I ask anyone that that they will call me a communist. LOL!
  • I’ve had three people ask me what church I go to–and have one man go out of his way to get me to join his. I appreciated all gestures.
  • The bar I went to last weekend that remind’s me of the Crystal Bar has SALOON doors as their bathroom stalls in the women’s bathroom. I died laughing.
  • Everyone here is SUPER nice–at least, the people I’ve met so far
  • My landlord said I had a neighbor that she thought was a doctor, however, I have seen no sign of ANYONE in the apartment as a piece of paper has been in the door ALL week and it’s been nothing but silence — ALSO, there’s been this car in the SAME spot ALL week as well, with clothes in it, and so no joke, I’m wondering if the person got kidnapped or…. Well…. Something…
  • My one neighbor’s dog downstairs barks at really obnoxious times–like almost every time I am walking up the stairs coming home from work and DOESN’T STOP barking
  • My other neighbor and her two sons are SUPER nice. Her one son was kind enough to help my parents, grandparents and me move stuff into my apartment last weekend
  • I almost hit a cat on my way to work yesterday. I know, awful. I kept thinking that if I had hit it I most certainly would have thrown up. Crisis averted.
  • On my way home from work the other night, a dog ran out in front of me and it made me sad that no one was even remotely close around looking for it 😦 I wanted to bring it home but obviously I wasn’t about to get fined by my apartment landlord, and I didn’t know if it was a nice dog or a mean dog. I do hope it found its way home or that someone else took it in.
  • Yesterday I got to do a phone interview with the country duo, LOCASH, who will be performing at next week’s Concert in the Park. Sidenote: They were SO nice! 🙂

I could go on and on about the little things I’ve observed/done in the week I’ve been here but, it’s now 11 p.m. and my laundry needs switched over, and I need to get some sleep tonight so I can wake up bright and early to pack and then hit the road back to Michigan tomorrow for the night. And as tired as I’ll be, I am SUPER excited because Cassie and I are going to Taste of Country in the afternoon AND my brother, sister-in-law and niece and nephew are coming to visit from Illinois. It’ll be a quick and bittersweet trip, but, well worth it. Especially since I’ll eventually have to work some weekends–hopefully not my birthday–but, even if I do, it’s okay because, I am doing what I love and practice will only continue to make perfect. 🙂

So, until next time…

XO,

Ana

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