19 Kids and Counting? How about zero kids and counting…

I don’t like kids.

There, I said it.

Now, before you get your boxers in a bunch and write me off as the world’s meanest woman. Hear me out.

It’s not that I necessarily think kids are the most awful things to exist on the planet (okay, maybe sometimes)–after all, I myself, and the rest of you, used to be kids once. But, I just don’t think they’re for everyone.

I have said for as long as I can remember that I simply don’t want kids. I’ve thrown out every possible reason why and people always seem to give me this judgmental stare. Like, how dare I not want kids when I am a woman and *most* have children. (I say most loosely because, well, there are a ton of women in the world and I am not sure exactly just how many have children already or are expecting.)

I then get asked why not, and how being a mother is the greatest thing in the world, all the while I am looking back at said person just waiting for her to be done talking.

Sounds terrible, right? But seriously, bear with me. I promise I am not a total baby hater, or mother hater for that matter.

I am simply at a time in my life where a) I am still young (even though I may say otherwise from time to time) b) I still live at home (that post-college life) c) I am SINGLE! (Pretty big one right there… Although, not saying that just because I get into a relationship I am automatically going to have kids) d) I am not yet fully established in my career and as a single woman, my main focus is and has been, my career.

I have always told myself that my career will be my number one focus until I achieve it. Now obviously once I achieve it and move on to the next chapter of my life (i.e. a relationship and-maybe kids) then that will be just as main of a focus in my life as my career.

But seriously, I don’t get why I get the stink-eye or other weird look when I say I don’t want kids. Of course, people tell me all the time that I could change my mind, and I assure them “NO” but, I’ve been thinking lately, that maybe–just maybe–one day I could change my mind. This new thought came to my mind after I found out one of my brothers and his wife are expecting a baby boy come July. I thought maybe someday I want my nieces and nephews (along with my new future nephew) to have a cousin(s) to play and grow up with. Of course, there are already cousins to play with, but also the fact the other women in my family–like my sisters and niece–have had their own kids as well. The point is, I just got to thinking and thought, maybe I shouldn’t write kids off completely.

Now I must explain, part of the reason I say (literally) “I’m so good” on having kids is because I do have so many nieces and nephews already–I am surrounded by kids. I mean, I have been an aunt since I was TWO AND A HALF YEARS OLD! TWO AND A HALF! And ever since then they’ve just kept on coming, lol. Plus, being the youngest of my five siblings in addition to having so many nieces and nephews, I just never felt like I was missing out on a ton by declaring I don’t want kids.

But, like I said, whenever I say I don’t want them it seems like people write me off right then and there. Sure, maybe I say it a little harshly but, in my opinion, not everyone has to have kids. In fact, I believe some people really SHOULD NOT have kids and yet, there they are–having kids. But that’s a whole different story-blog in itself.

I remember telling my mom one time a month or so ago that as a woman, I shouldn’t feel obligated to have a kid. I feel like society puts this pressure (whether it’s intentional or not) for women to have kids. Plus, not only that, but when we see celebrities like Brangelina adopting kids left and right… Or the Duggars and their 19 kids… Etc. Etc. I can’t help but think some people are influenced by that. However, I am not. I mean, to each their own for how many children they have but IF I ever were to have kids I sure as hell would not want that many. If I had the money like Brangelina then MAYBE, but, NINETEEN like the Duggars–NO WAY! But again, to each their own. My whole thought on kids if you are going to have them–properly take care of them. They need shelter, clothes, food… But most importantly–they need LOVE. What good is the rest of the stuff if it isn’t in addition to being loved?

I think what bothers me is that there are people out there who believe that just because they have a kid (or kids) that they can and are equipped to take care of them.

Um, I’m sorry, but NO.

That is not always the case.

As a woman who was adopted, I thank my birth mother for making the tough, yet smart decision to place me for adoption so someone else could give me all the things she couldn’t (like food, a good home, stability, education, etc.).

But, again, that’s another story in itself.

My point is, women (and even men) shouldn’t feel like they need to have a child(ren) just because everyone else in society does or because they get pressure from family and friends. I am a believer that kids just aren’t for everyone and that is fine. And if it’s not fine with you well then, sorry I’m not sorry.

My other point is, is that maybe–MAYBE–I could see myself having a kid one day.* (*Far future, not any time soon.) Plus, people always tell me to “never say never” and you know, maybe they’re right. But, if I do decide to have kids one day then it will be when I am READY. Not just for the sake of it–not just for shits and giggles.

So just a friendly reminder that the next time you want to write someone off as a bitch, or horrible person, or whatever, for not wanting or not yet having kids, consider WHY they might not want one. (Just a thought)

I know I’ve been adamant, and well, even now as I type this, that motherhood isn’t for me–but maybe, just maybe, I may change my mind in the future. Because even though quite frankly, other people’s (outside of my family and close friends) kids annoy the shit out of me (sorry if that’s blunt but, it’s how I feel), I do love my nieces and nephews and see the joy they bring to my siblings (their parents).

So, here’s to the future… Trying to not remain so dead set on never having kids, ever, but, being open to the possibility, should one day I have all of my ducks in a row–i.e. dream job, dream house, dream man, etc… Or at least, you know, a decent job, house and man to start and raise a family with. ūüėČ God only knows what my future holds… Well, and me too technically. But anyway…

Until next time…

XO,
Ana

There’s No Place Like HOM…

It’s Thursday night, and I am currently sitting at my kitchen table, feeling a tad hypocritical for having just had leftover pizza for dinner, and wanting an ice cold beer, but, not having any, while I stare right at my new It Works! starter kit that came in the mail today.

For those of you who don’t know the gist of It Works!, it’s that “crazy wrap thing”… That aims to help you tone, tighten and detoxify your body. Along with a line including a bunch of other products designed to help you be healthier.

Anyway, not my point of this blog…

It’s Thursday night, and I have officially completed week one of my internship at HOMTV.

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HOMTV coffee mug.

While it has only been a couple of days, I must say I am super eager to see what the rest of this semester/experience holds. I have already learned so much in such a short period of time, that I can’t wait to find out what else I will learn from the program/workshops itself, but through my own trials and tribulations.

The first day was orientation, where learned the overview of the program along with the usual procedures and policies. Oh, and we went over dress code… Note To Self: Create shoe bag and leave in car.¬†LOL! I am seriously going to find my best shoes and put them in a bag and leave them in my car so I am always prepared. I wore my Ugg boots to the Wednesday night workshop and while no one said anything, I accidentally¬†forgot my work shoes from my coat closet at home. But, given the weather this week, my initial thought was Uggs=WARMTH! LOL.

We also got our picture taken for the HOMTV website, which, I am super geeked about. And yes, I just used the word “geeked.” (A one-time thing, I swear, lol) Not only will this picture be used on the main HOMTV website, but it will also be used for my soon-to-be in live action, FACEBOOOK FAN PAGE! Yep, that’s right. Us reporters get a fan page! I am telling you this now so you can remember to “like” it on Facebook as soon as it’s up and running.

The following day for my morning shift we watched archive videos of past newscasts and wrote our bios for the HOMTV website. It was a little strange at first, writing in the third person, about myself, but, once I got going I couldn’t be stopped. I wrote the serious stuff, like where I graduated from, what I studied, and where I see myself after the internship. And then, of course, I put the fun stuff–like that in my free time I like to watch my favorite TV shows Pretty Little Liars and Criminal Minds, and that I am a coffee mug collector. And course love Chipotle and shoes. (Although, Chipotle, not so much lately… You know, given their whole E-Coli deal…)

Then, later that evening was our first workshop–the reporting workshop. During this we learned about the¬†Society of Professional Journalists: Code of Ethics, the various terms used in television, and watched previous interns’ work, i.e. packages and stand-ups. I most excited about this workshop, as this is the track I will be focusing on–reporting.

The second day, morning shift, we continued/finished watching the archive videos of old newscasts and began working on our first exam. Our first exam is due Tuesday. Will work on that this weekend. EEEK! The evening portion was our field production workshop–where we learned all about how to use a camera. It was a lot of information to process, but, I definitely learned a lot. It makes me even more eager (although just as nervous, too) to get out there and start shooting stuff.

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Me and Ar-Rel getting ready for our future close-ups.

This morning I had off. In the evening we had our editing workshop, which involved even¬†more¬†information than last night. I feel super nervous and overwhelmed at the moment, but, after talking to some of the other interns and a seasoned intern, I can move forward knowing it’s okay/normal to feel this way and that everything will be okay. The workshop tonight taught us how to import, export and edit our footage. It’s a lot to do and a lot to remember, but, like I said before, I AM looking forward to it! Can’t wait to see how I improve over the course of the semester. Yay!

Anyway… So that is what my first week at HOMTV was like. I’ll try to update this more frequently as the internship goes on, but, I know the internship itself will keep me fairly busy so, we’ll see. Anyway, look for me on Facebook soon–my fan page. And, if you haven’t already, be sure to like the HOMTV Faceboo0k page itself by clicking¬†here¬†as well as their Twitter handle at¬†@HOMTV.

Until next time…

XO,

Ana

The best way to predict your future is to create it…

I got dolled up for NYE 2016 knowing already I was going to be one overdressed woman. But, as one of my older sisters said, you can never be too formal for NYE. So, I went with it and chose the dress that was not only comfortable but that I felt like a princess in. And I was very much treated like a princess that day as my other older sister was nice enough to curl my hair… Since whenever I try to do it, like today, it turns out nothing like it should. HA! Plus I had the sparkling jewelry, shoes and purse to match. ūüôā

Anyway, so the plan was to meet up at a friend’s apartment beforehand and later head to Dublin in EL. Well, we thought we left at an appropriate time but it turns out we didn’t. The line wasn’t even that long but bouncer at the door told us they were at capacity.

My friends and I peered in the windows of the building and it seemed nowhere near capacity. We questioned whether we should bear the cold longer than we already had until we heard no new people would be let in until HALFTIME of the big game. After that we weighed our options and low-and-behold, ended up at Rick’s across the street.

Of course my natural reaction was horror, as I had been there ONCE before, and that in my opinion was enough. But, I wanted to stay with my friends and didn’t want to be too much of a negative Nancy so I went with it. And later in the night and the following day, I realized just how much fun I had. It wasn’t my top place to ring in the New Year 2016, but, in the end I was just happy with WHO I was with and NOT where I was at.

I am grateful to have rung in another year with my best friends. It’s funny, my brother, mom and I were having a conversation about something the other day and my brother asked, “You and your friends never fight?” It may seem weird but my response was, “No.” Sure, we may get on each other’s nerves at time but, we never full on ever argue or anything like that. To some that may not seem “normal” but, you know what, I’m perfectly content with not being normal.

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Cassie, Me & Sarahann on NYE 2016


Our friendship started back (now this year) 13 years ago… And how we all have remained this close–to be honest, I am not sure–but damnit, I’m glad and grateful we did. We all went to different colleges, but our friendship never once changed. We dated people, got involved on campus and became busy with things and people outside of our friendship but once we were all back in town it was as if nothing ever changed. And to this day, it still hasn’t. I feel very fortunate that it hasn’t either. I don’t think most people can say that about a friendship.

Of course on NYE our group was missing a few, but, they were with us in spirit–off celebrating elsewhere–but it doesn’t matter if we’re physically together everyday, we can still pick up right where we left out.

Now I will be honest, there are times where I do worry that some day, in the far, far future we may drift apart–not because we necessarily want to but because we will grow older and other priorities will begin to take focus in life. But, if there’s anything I learned in life it’s to focus on the NOW. Don’t dwell on the past, don’t worry about the future. And I’m going to try my best to do that in 2016.

I’m not sure what the future holds for me this year, or the next, or the year after that, but one thing is for sure–it’ll be what I make of it.

Next week I start my internship at HOMTV, which I am SUPER excited about. As some may or may not know, my previous news job didn’t work out but, it just means the job wasn’t the right fit for me and that my dream job and job that IS MEANT for me is still out there waiting for me. And, I have a feeling this internship will teach me even more to ensure I am well-equipped for my next job afterward.

Now, while of course I am excited about my professional life, I am also super excited about my personal life. It’s been awhile since I’ve dated, like a long while, which, why I am admitting, I have no idea, but, I’ve decided it’s time to step OUTSIDE of my comfort zone and not only take chances–but give chances to people as well. I never know who I may meet who could just be the love of my life. I love love and am a firm believer in it, and believe my “soulmate” is out there. Some people may not believe in soulmates or love and think it’s lame or cheesy that I do but it’s who I am and that’s something that’ll never change.

So, here is to a fresh start, clean slate–whatever you want to call it. I wish whoever is reading this a happy and healthy new year. Know that this year, your life, is what YOU make of it. So be like me, and don’t be afraid to step outside of your comfort zone. I am going to try my best to do so this year and see what comes of it.

Until next time…

XOXO,

Ana