September 2016 – ThirtySomething Shenanigans

So I decided I would try something a little different with this blog post today and do a list of my miscellaneous thoughts I have while going about my day. Could be interesting… I think. LOL!

As of 11 a.m. Thursday, these are the thoughts I’ve had since waking up.

Why in the hell is my volume ALL THE WAY UP on my phone when my alarm is set? Obviously forgot to turn it down last night–must have been too distracted pondering why and how the hell Jordan won Big Brother.
Why do I have to be up before the sun is up? My mind still thinks it’s night time and therefore should still be in bed. But no, I am not in bed. I get up groggily being pissed I haven’t had my morning cup of coffee yet.
Why is it going to be so damn hot outside today and the rest of this week AND for the next few weeks? Today marks the first day of fall but, must be April Fool’s Day because the temperatures outside DO NOT reflect the season. Then I wonder what to wear because 99.9 percent of the time the office is freezing like Antarctica but then I step outside and “bam! It’s a heatwave.” I choose to be sweating outside rather than freezing on the inside so I leave my apartment dressed in a long-sleeved black wool sweater and blue jeans and over-the-knee boots. LOL. Thank God I only had one interview scheduled for OUTSIDE of the office. I win! Although *side note*, the office isn’t even cold today so… that’s awkward. LOL.
What do I want for breakfast today? Keep telling myself I need to and am going to diet but then what happens? I sabotage my own plan and eat fast food, etc. I think to myself that this morning I might as well eat the food I bought from the grocery store earlier this week so it doesn’t go bad–without regard for proper food portion since I already sabotaged my diet for the week, right?
Prepares said breakfast food, which is a bagel–turn up the dial just a little bit higher than than the other day since the bagel did not toast. What happens today? The toast literally starts smoking and stinks up my entire kitchen. Does not eat bagel for breakfast, running out of time. Have to drive 45 minutes to Huntington today. Aint nobody got time for this. LOL.
Why do I always get stuck behind slow cars? ALWAYS! I AM going the speed limit, and I would appreciate it if you did the same, or simply pulled over while I pass you, jerk.
Why is that semis here in Indiana don’t seem to know that if you’re going to get in the left lane then you need to speed up just a hair and actually pass the semi that was previously in front of you. Michigan semi drivers know this, why don’t you? I have places to be, people!
Once off the highway, I get stuck behind slow people yet again, this time behind a school bus and pick up truck. Cooooome on, people! I am literally so close to work I can smell it! LOL. But that’s okay, don’t think I don’t have anywhere important to be. Time apparently isn’t of the essence to some people.
While doing an interview… I really need to work on my eye contact vs. looking away ratio. I’ve realized I’ve gotten really bad at staring people down and not knowing how, when or where to look away and then I just come across as even more awkward as I am. HALP!
I am so beyond excited this office got new computers AND a coffee maker, even if I am only helping here temporarily. It makes me really want to bring my extra Keurig from home to our newsroom. Think I will put that on my list of things to bring back here with me next weekend when I visit home. Also, great job and shout out to Tina for doing a deep cleaning of the newsroom and buying wallflower plug ins because the place smells and looks AMAZING!

Okay, those are all my thoughts for now. I’ll update this later after work because I’m bound to have countless more miscellaneous thoughts throughout the day. And as I’ve been told, even if only by one person (LOL), that my snap chat videos of my thoughts are funny so I am hoping these thoughts in print are just as funny, too.

*UPDATE: 7:04 p.m.*

1. Currently (trying to) enjoy(ing) dinner before I head home from work… wondering why this restaurant doesn’t have a “please wait to be seated” sign or anything out and then making me look like a fool for just standing there awkwardly waiting for someone to acknowledge me.

2. Wondering why restaurants don’t make special sections with small tables for people who choose to dine alone.

3. Wondering why I am surrounded by families with kids and ALL the kids are annoying. Little boy, sit down. Eat your food and just be calm.

4. I am WELL AWARE I am Hispanic and that you assume I speak Spanish based on how I look but I don’t and you will, or SHOULD know after I talk to you IN ENGLISH, that I in fact do not speak Spanish. So why you insist to ask me IN SPANISH if I SPEAK SPANISH is counterproductive.

5. Like can’t a girl just walk into a Mexican restaurant and NOT be gawked at or it be assumed I speak Spanish. Please?

6. Family beside me is still super annoying and wondering how they haven’t left yet. Why are your kids so fidgety?

7. Just serves as another reminder as to why I don’t want kids.

8. Thought about getting a drink but seeing as I have to drive 45 minutes I passed but will be having one as soon as I get home.

9. I had so many Kermit the Frog moments today, hence the needed drink. I just don’t get some people but, to each their own. I have bigger fish to fry so better luck next time.

10. Family beside me is FINALLY leaving. Slowly, but surely. 👏🏽

That’s all for now.

Until next time…

XO,

Ana

Call me crazy but, I love love love.

I’ve been in love before, and I hope, pray and know I’ll fall in love again. But, when?

Here I am X amount of years after a relationship wondering when and where, not if, I’ll meet my Mr. Right a.k.a. Prince Charming.

You’re probably wondering why I’m even rambling about this on a Monday night at 11 o clock. LOL! Just thinking about my weekend encounter when I tried to TALK to another human being of the opposite sex. 😂 LMAO! But more about that later on in this post…

Okay, so maybe I sound like some young, naive girl who still believes in “fairytales”. But that’s just it–I don’t still believe in fairytales. I just have and always will. Quite frankly, I don’t see what’s wrong with that?

Moving to a new state a few months ago I thought the dating scene might improve, meaning I’d have more selection and variety or, that I would just be more willing and able to give chances to people, without regard to where I meet them (online or in person). I come across men when I’m out at the bars back home and come across men all the time when I’m out in the field working; although the latter isn’t the appropriate time or place to meet eligible bachelor men. Lol. Anyway…

But, while meeting a cute guy at the bar and trying my best not to be awkward, I can’t help but think it’s his loss if he thinks in the end my awkwardness is too weird/a turn off anyway. Hell, maybe he is just interested in a hook-up, which, sure, on one hand doesn’t sound all that bad if I was still in college and in general, younger, but, at 26 I’m just no longer into it. Or maybe I just need to brush on my skills on how to flirt and not be awkward. LOL! HALP!

But look, I am a real adult now. Or you know, am for the most part. 😂 I live in a completely different town and state than where I grew up my whole life. I have a cute little two bedroom apartment that feels like home (to the best of my ability), and, am finally doing what I’ve always wanted to do–be a reporter. Thankfully I’m in love with my job but, I don’t want that to be my whole life.

Like I said above, and I’ve said before: I love love. I am fortunate to have experienced it once before, despite it not working out in the end, because I am a firm believer, and I think probably was before experiencing it myself–it’s better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. I don’t know whether it’s based solely on personal experience or from me watching fairytale movies whether they’re Disney or adult rom-coms, but, I definitely do believe love exists and believe I, too, am meant to fall in love again, at least (hopefully) once more.

Before I fell in love for my first time when I was 17 I thought people could only fall in love once. And I think a part of me thought that because I thought my (then) boyfriend and I would get that “happily-ever-after” I had always dreamed of. But when we broke up, and at that (still somewhat young) age, I wasn’t able yet to recognize that everything happens for a reason. Yes, it broke my heart and I was devastated, and didn’t think I would be able to love again or move on at the time–but, as time went on and I got older, I realized not just my life but, any person in general who has had their heart broken, has so much more to gain and learn about themselves and life in general in the “healing” and “moving on” process.

I didn’t see it at first at the time as I truly thought my world and life as I knew it was over but, I am thankful and grateful for having been able to love and experienced my own heartbreak for I would not be the woman I am today–the woman I was meant to be–without having experienced it.

But, flash forward to now–here I am at 26 years old, more than ready to fall in love again. I hope to not experience heartbreak again but should life have it happen that way then I accept it. Plus, I know heartbreak can come in forms beyond just love, and thankfully based on my past experience I can now accept it better should it happen again.

But at my age and my status in life–living and working in a completely new area–where is one to find a nice, single, decent guy?

I’m sure some people reading this think I’m being too picky. And sure, maybe I am. But, I believe so deeply and passionately about love, that I want to date, hell–hopefully marry–someone who feels just the same. Love is much too precious to me to be thrown around so casually. I don’t despise people who throw the word around loosely but, I personally wouldn’t throw it around loosely at my age and in this day. Because like I said, I was able to experience love firsthand myself at once before. And the age I was doesn’t affect my feelings and belief towards it. Some people may shake their head in disbelief that I could feel such a way at 17 but, as someone whose own parents are high school sweethearts and got married when they were that age, I think it’s perfectly fine and acceptable for me to feel and think the way I do.

And while I haven’t yet found that special someone, that doesn’t go to say I haven’t tried. Like I mentioned above, I’ve tried “meeting” people out at the bar–I.e. Us both tips-ily (if that was a real word, lol) flirting or simply talking with one another but, it didn’t extend beyond a casual exchange of numbers and one polite follow up text the next day.

And then of course there’s the whole world of online dating. Where do I begin with that? I am a supporter of online dating and definitely don’t see anything weird, or “abnormal” about it like some others may view it as. But, to be honest, I think my in-person awkwardness translates to the online world, too, lol. Again, some may say I’m being too picky but, I can’t imagine not setting the bar high enough and ending up with a “Barney”. (See: Clueless) I for one value education dearly, and while I understand and accept some people go on to live fantastic, perfectly great lives without a college degree, etc. I want someone who can atleast appreciate the effort of trying. If there’s another thing I learned in life it’s that nothing worth having comes easy. I am thankful to have parents who showed me that hard work will allow you to be successful and provide an opportunity for growth. I am proud of myself, and for both my parents and my entire family, for always being my cheerleaders along the way, pushing my to finish college strong, or any goal for that matter, regardless of how long it took–like to graduate. (I took an extra 5th year but, I finished)

I want to date someone who has that same motivation and determination I did and do, whether or not there’s a group of cheerleaders behind him. But of course, I do hope he does have a great support system, because that’s just as important to me.

You see, I am close with my family. I love my family and truly can’t imagine calling any other group of people my family. I am blessed and fortunate enough to be the youngest of six kids and have several nieces, nephews, great-nieces, etc. And that’s another huge thing for me when looking for Mr. Right, a.k.a. my Prince Charming–they have to value family as much as me. The truth is, if you don’t have family at the end of the day, who else can you lean and rely on?

I could go on and on about the qualities I look for in a guy. Sure, like I said, some people may say I’m too picky or this, this or that, but, at the end of the day I am happy with my life, working my dream job, and experiencing this new town and city. Obviously I would love to find a companion to share in this crazy adventure with me but, until then I’ll enjoy the ride solo.

So until next time…

XO,

Ana

Month: September 2016

I want to be your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye…